TimAllen.com
 FAQ   Search   Memberlist   Usergroups   Register   Profile   Log in to check your private messages   Log in 

Tell your best Joke or one liner
Goto page Previous  1, 2, 3, 4
 
Post new topic   Reply to topic    TimAllen.com Forum Index -> The Comic Within
View previous topic :: View next topic  
Author Message
rela



Joined: 25 Mar 2007
Posts: 1602
Location: Croatia

PostPosted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 3:17 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Why does blond open the yogurt in the store?
Cos it says:Open Here.

A blond sits in the taxi.And as they were riding,the cab man says:Could you see through the window if I gotta flat tire?She does that,and while doing that,the cab man closes the window and traps her head,and starts to **** her.He says:You see how we cab men are smart! and the blond takes of her wig and says:You see how we gay are smart!
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
2uhlman



Joined: 03 Feb 2009
Posts: 5
Location: Midland , Texas

PostPosted: Tue Feb 03, 2009 9:10 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Pierre and Beaudreaux are 2 Cajun roughnecks from Baton Rouge. They were layed off from work when the oil boom died in the 1980's. Well one day they both get a card from the workforce commission offering them a temporary job with a large oil refinery. They both apply and get hired on as temp's . They are such good workers that the refinery hires them permanently. Well , a year goes by and they are doing so well that they are promoted to the NASA's rocket fuel division. another six months goes by and one day ol' Beaudreaux is bored beyond belief. So he get's his coffee cup and dips it into the the rocket fuel tank and takes a sniff, "Man, this smells just like Southern Comfort!" he says to himself. He takes a sip and to his suprise it tastes just like it as well. He hollers at ol' Pierre his buddy and the next thing you know they are getting their fill on rocket fuel. Well this particular day they are car pooling and Pierre is driving. Pierre drops ol' Beaudreaux off at his house and proceeds to drive himself home. He gets home and as he is getting his key into the door he notices his phone is continuously ringing. He gets inside and picks up the receiver and it is of course,Beaudreaux,who is screaming to Pierre,"Whatever you do,dont FART!"Pierre asks him why and Beaudreaux replies, " I am calling from Pittsburgh!"
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Send e-mail Visit poster's website Yahoo Messenger
Bermudagirl



Joined: 10 Mar 2005
Posts: 1533
Location: Austria

PostPosted: Sat Feb 20, 2010 10:56 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Dear Warner Brothers: Now that I'm an adult, I feel I'm am old enough to hear what the "Beep Beep" is hiding when Road Runner talks to Wile E. Coyote.
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Visit poster's website
my_face_is_on_fire



Joined: 19 Feb 2010
Posts: 57

PostPosted: Sat Feb 20, 2010 1:10 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

The CIA, FBI, and LAPD are all arguing about who the best law enforcement agency is the best and decide to ask the president. The president set up a test and took them to a nearby forest and released a rabbit, telling them that the agency who catches it the quickest is the best. The first to go in was the CIA and after two weeks, they concluded rabbits don't exist. The FBI went in next and after two days in their stand off, they set the forest on fire and killed the rabbit. The LAPD then went in and came out two hours later with a badly beaten raccoon screaming "Ok, Ok! I'm a rabbit, I'm a rabbit!".
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
artist



Joined: 11 Oct 2006
Posts: 5207
Location: Brackwater Swamp

PostPosted: Wed Feb 24, 2010 12:19 pm    Post subject: LOL Reply with quote

my_face_is_on_fire wrote:
The CIA, FBI, and LAPD are all arguing about who the best law enforcement agency is the best and decide to ask the president. The president set up a test and took them to a nearby forest and released a rabbit, telling them that the agency who catches it the quickest is the best. The first to go in was the CIA and after two weeks, they concluded rabbits don't exist. The FBI went in next and after two days in their stand off, they set the forest on fire and killed the rabbit. The LAPD then went in and came out two hours later with a badly beaten raccoon screaming "Ok, Ok! I'm a rabbit, I'm a rabbit!".


I don't know any jokes; but I love this one, thanks for sharing it!
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Visit poster's website
my_face_is_on_fire



Joined: 19 Feb 2010
Posts: 57

PostPosted: Wed Feb 24, 2010 6:00 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

You're welcome.
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
Emrad



Joined: 12 Jan 2009
Posts: 225
Location: DM12

PostPosted: Wed Mar 24, 2010 3:05 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

"I see", said eye.

...It's only a little one!

Emrad
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
jay2010



Joined: 22 Apr 2010
Posts: 22

PostPosted: Fri Apr 23, 2010 5:44 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

my_face_is_on_fire wrote:
The CIA, FBI, and LAPD are all arguing about who the best law enforcement agency is the best and decide to ask the president. The president set up a test and took them to a nearby forest and released a rabbit, telling them that the agency who catches it the quickest is the best. The first to go in was the CIA and after two weeks, they concluded rabbits don't exist. The FBI went in next and after two days in their stand off, they set the forest on fire and killed the rabbit. The LAPD then went in and came out two hours later with a badly beaten raccoon screaming "Ok, Ok! I'm a rabbit, I'm a rabbit!".

hahaha! love this one Very Happy
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
Emrad



Joined: 12 Jan 2009
Posts: 225
Location: DM12

PostPosted: Fri Jul 24, 2015 8:53 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Emrad wrote:
"I see", said eye.

...It's only a little one!

Emrad


... Just going through the site this morning... I didn't recall posting that one.

Anyway... just recently I was contemplating a new recipe...
I call it Blueberry Puffin...
It would be an aukward dish...
Shocked

Emrad
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
thekolonel100



Joined: 22 Mar 2016
Posts: 30

PostPosted: Wed Mar 23, 2016 11:24 pm    Post subject: howdy Reply with quote

Intellectually stimulating experience...sex.
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Send e-mail
Display posts from previous:   
Post new topic   Reply to topic    TimAllen.com Forum Index -> The Comic Within All times are GMT - 8 Hours
Goto page Previous  1, 2, 3, 4
Page 4 of 4

 
Jump to:  
You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum


Powered by phpBB © 2001, 2005 phpBB Group

Theme xand created by spleen.