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KatieSandstrom



Joined: 07 Dec 2002
Posts: 152
Location: North Pole, Alaska

PostPosted: Mon Apr 11, 2005 4:52 am    Post subject: Fear Reply with quote

I had a lovely weekend. Nothing could bother me. Complete happiness.
The only thing that could bring this emotional high back down to the dirt is that good ol word...fear.

This got me thinking. How do y'all deal with fear? We all have it, get it, live in it.
Fear is such a powerful emotion that can dig its roots deep within all of us. I am curious to know how others deal with it.
For me, fear when confronted makes me stronger.
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PostPosted: Mon Apr 11, 2005 5:45 am    Post subject: Fear of fear? Reply with quote

Kp,

Fear, the fight or flight tendency is the wisdom of the body to react to danger. Almost without thinking the body will perform kung fu like movements to protect itself and return to a stable state of safety.

Mental fear is different, it has no place in the mind. The mind cannot react in the same way the body does to return to a stable state of calm. It does require an active acknowlegement of the basis of the mental fear, then a conclusion must be reached as to how one will deal with it.
Fear of disease, dying, accident, lonleyness, poverty are all real things that happen to people. At some point we all die, we all get sick, we all experience poverty, we all become unhappy for one reason or another.

To think we can avoid these things by some chant or positive thinking process is just wishful thinking.

The best we can do is to prepare for worst and hope for the best.

When the mind is calm and free of fear it operates at is absolute best every time. To allow fear a place in your mind disables your best equipment from working properly. If the main processor is constantly interupted by this unresolvable fear routine, how do you expect anything else to function as you expect it should.

This is why evil loves fear. It disables you from functioning as you should and casting it out from where it does not belong.
Since Christ's appearance on earth we have been reclaiming the kingdom of God from evil. It's not the air or the earth we reclaim but our minds. Every healing first takes place in the mind and spirit then the body, all are made whole.

Be the master of your own house (mind), learn from the master how this is done and do it. On every occassion he said " It is your faith that has saved you" your willingness to take action.

Gees... sorry for the long windedness.

K
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lg
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PostPosted: Tue Apr 12, 2005 3:44 am    Post subject: Fear Reply with quote

Sometimes, the best I can do with fear is to acknowledge it. Then, it seems to go into some file in my mind, with other useless things. Every now and then, I reboot the mind...and I see the particular fear was either baseless, or something to reference in the future, for remembrance of futility. L.
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Writer16



Joined: 10 Nov 2004
Posts: 91
Location: CA

PostPosted: Tue Apr 12, 2005 9:38 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

It kind of depends on what the fear is...

Whenever I'm fearful of something, fear of rejection, for example, kind of like what I'm dealing with this week, I tend to plunge right in and push whatever way possible until the obstacle has either fallen or I do, then wait for round two and you have to do it all over again...

If it's of a person or something physical, like a few weeks ago, I have never gotten into trouble, nor do I intend to, so I hightailed it out of there...
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K.C.



Joined: 25 Jan 2003
Posts: 109
Location: Tucson, Arizona

PostPosted: Wed Apr 13, 2005 7:10 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I have only had fear in my life since I had kids. Nothing scared me until then. My daughter has had over thirty eye surgeries, and everytime I had my child over to the guys in scrubs I feel fear. Mind numbing fear. I don't think I ever had any kind of scare before then.
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joalis



Joined: 01 Dec 2004
Posts: 1155

PostPosted: Wed Apr 13, 2005 9:18 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I don't expereince fear often enough to contemplate the feeling. Maybe I just don't feel it intensely enough. Or maybe I'm lucky I've never had anything to be incredibly fearful about.
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lg
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PostPosted: Sun Apr 17, 2005 6:00 am    Post subject: fear Reply with quote

W16, what you wrote is the perfect example of 'fight or flight'.
It is wonderful, I would think, to never truly experience fear. J, you must have some good karma!
Fear is sort of like a plug in a bath tub, isn't it? You build up all that courage, and in one moment, the plug is pulled and you wonder if you're made of jelly. Like K.C. stated, I feel it has to do with attachment. Those things I find 'impersonal' don't create fear. Personal things, do...the state of the world can build into some massive fear, for me. Reading Revelations has ALWAYS created fear in me. Anything to do with my children, grandchildren, or husband...any jeopardy to them...creates fear. So, my extreme attachments are regulators of how much fear can enter my being...my fear factor is directly related to my faith factor, somehow. I know this, but it is hard to get the tuning right.
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Canadienne



Joined: 16 Dec 2004
Posts: 25

PostPosted: Sun Apr 17, 2005 8:50 am    Post subject: Fear Reply with quote

First of all, KP, I never would have considered you to be a particularly fearful person! I am surprised.

I think FEAR is the one and only thing behind just about everything that is wrong with the world today, and we all have it, unfortunately. But am I convinced that it is an inescapable part of the human condition? No. Why? because ALL FEAR IS LEARNED.

What scares you won't scare others and vice versa. Which leads to the next question: If all fear is learned and therefore entirely subjective, do we really need to be afraid of ANYTHING? Does it benefit us in any way?

I often wonder what the world would be like if we could all let go of our fears and think and behave rationally and compassionately all the time. I strongly believe that all bad behaviour, anger and aggression is based on fear.

I wish I could wave a magic wand and dispell all the fear from this world all at once. But in lieu of that, I guess we all have to keep experimenting with various methods to see what works best for us: faith, prayer, meditation, counselling, positive thinking, confronting things etc.

Good luck, and keep trying everything you can until you find what works for you.
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KatieSandstrom



Joined: 07 Dec 2002
Posts: 152
Location: North Pole, Alaska

PostPosted: Sun Apr 17, 2005 5:52 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Canadienne, I never think of myself as a fearful person. Then when I sit down and think about it a few fears come to mind.

Fear of my child dying.
Fear of falling in love again.
Fear of facing a burglar again.

I notice as I type these fears and face them in print my instincts to put the strong protective sheild goes up. This can be good and bad.
It is a balancing act, like walking a tight rope. I am always trying to find the happy middle ground.
Life is too precious to be living in fear. I find it is always better to face it, deal with it, learn from it, and grow. It also helps to buy a gun to take on the next burglar that tries to invade my home Wink
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PostPosted: Mon Apr 18, 2005 5:18 am    Post subject: Fear and courage Reply with quote

Kp,

Acts of courage are not fearless... quite the opposite.
Whenever people perform heroic acts they will be the first to tell you they were scared out of their wits before, during and after the act.
Fear did not stop them. Not the fear of failure, not the fear of dying, not the fear of personal loss, fear in all it's trappings did not influence them negatively.
By these demonstations we can conclude, fear is non-existant. It lives or dies by our actions.
In order for something like a belief to be real it must manifest itself by it's own power. If it cannot do that, it is not real.

We, on the other hand must obey the same law by manifesting our beliefs by our actions.

Don't give any fear ammunition to be used in the battle against yourself.
You will come to realize, you are a warrior, king or queen but not a pawn.

I've heard it said that "if you act like a doormat, don't be surprized if people walk all over you".

K
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lg
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PostPosted: Thu Apr 28, 2005 6:17 am    Post subject: response Reply with quote

Canadienne, in your post you asked what the world might be like if everyone let go of fear...

In our topic about being a mediator in the Middle East, the whys and wherefores sieved into the base expression of what their fears might actually be. I think from the beginning of time, fear started as a protection device, like a hand brake, but has ended up an emotional crutch...in the same way pain killers are needed during crises, but can become what they are not meant to be. We do not seem to know how to delineate the different nuances of fear.

These days, the epidemic of 'panic attacks' is so widespread I don't understand why the medical community does not address it as such. Fear begins to coarse through our bodys from the adrenal glands, receiving its signal from the hypothalamus in the brain. Panic attacks are such an overproduction of cortisol from the adrenals, they can simulate pending death. Powerful stuff. I believe if the scientific community could isolate this reaction, a great deal of fear, in general, could be addressed and possibly controlled by natural hormonal means rather than stupifying drugs. We know about fight and flight, we just don't know how to do anything about it. It's as if the guage has been broken and we live in an all or nothing reality. The ability to naturally handle gross fears might move us closer to true living. (If we are what we eat, the media needs to stop feeding us, as one small step to level cortisol.) But thats just my opinion....L.
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K.C.



Joined: 25 Jan 2003
Posts: 109
Location: Tucson, Arizona

PostPosted: Thu Apr 28, 2005 10:22 am    Post subject: Fear and being stupid Reply with quote

Since we are on the subject of fear, I find that there are times I should be fearful, but stupid kicks in. "What is she talking about?" your saying to yourself......Well I have an example;

I was 35 and VERY pregnate with my son. I was at an intersection and I was waiting to turn left. Traffic is coming so I wait. Now behind me is a truck driver, who is so close to my rear bumper I can tell what color his eyes are, starts beeping his horn. Now there is no where I can go...But he keeps beeping....
Finally I get so ticked off, I get OUT of my car, in the middle of traffic, and walk over to the driver behind me.
It is hot so his window is down. I yell up to him, "DO YOU NOT SEE THE CARS?" The truck driver looks down and says nothing. "CAN YOU HEAR ME?" i yell up to him "If you think I can make traffic go away, you are WRONG!!! So lay off the 'bleep bleep' horn!"
And I swear he said he was sorry. I was so upset I just waved him off and got back into my car and sat until the next green light.
As soon as I got to my destination, all I could think was "How stupid am I?" I got out in the middle of traffic to yell at a man, who looked like a reject from a biker gang for being too scary. What if I had been hit by a car? What if the trucker had a gun or knife? Fear did not hit me until it was over, now that is just stupid.
How is that for fear?
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KatieSandstrom



Joined: 07 Dec 2002
Posts: 152
Location: North Pole, Alaska

PostPosted: Thu Apr 28, 2005 12:39 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

K.C.
Klatu was saying that acts of courage are not fearless, but the opposite.
I think we were both operating on instinct with your trucker and my burglar. Then after the fact we see the stupid side of the what if's.
After my burglar incident I felt the stupid side of it too...What if he had a gun? What if he was stronger? I could have been raped and murdered.
But in the heat of the moment, my rage and anger took over. How dare somebody try to break into my home and try to hurt me. I was ready to kill him! I think he was more afriad of me than I was of him. Picture me holding a big butcher knife yelling and screaming, " It's not against the law for me to cut you up and kill you as long as I do it when you are breaking and entering into my home. So come on buddy, I dare you, step into my house and I swear I'll cut you up like I'm gutting a moose! You picked the wrong house to break into. You set one foot into my house and I WILL KILL YOU!"
This happened at the door as we struggled against opposite sides of the door. I won and got the door dead bolted, then ran to the kitchen, grabbed the knife and ran back to the front window waving my big knife screaming like a woman warrior ready for war.
The hardest part was dealing with the after shock of it all. Trying to go to sleep at night, the fear of what could of happened, the what if's.
That happened 8 years ago tomorrow. To this day it still affects me. I still jump when I hear a noise at night...ready for the next burglar.
This is where I have the fear attached...fear of it all happening again.
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lg
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PostPosted: Thu Apr 28, 2005 1:14 pm    Post subject: fear Reply with quote

I loved it K.C.! 'should have been afraid, but stupid kicked in'...too funny!
Girls, I believe in Karma. K.C., my Dad always said God protects the innocent and the stupid. There you go. Remember that moments of serene purpose in the middle of madness have done remarkable things in the world. Katie, after that display of emotion and guts, how could you feel anyone would ever try that again? If there are angels watching, don't you know they batted a few eyelashes before laughing like hell? If that was a test, you passed.
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K.C.



Joined: 25 Jan 2003
Posts: 109
Location: Tucson, Arizona

PostPosted: Thu Apr 28, 2005 6:15 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I think the diffence between Kate and I were; She was protecting not only herself, but her home. and frankly I would had no problems with that story ending with you making him into a kabob.
In my case, I was tired, hot and seven months pregnat, and tired of a moron beeping in my ear. I was just stupid.
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