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Tim Allen Quotes

 
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barbara



Joined: 07 Dec 2002
Posts: 181
Location: Kalamazoo, Michigan

PostPosted: Fri Feb 21, 2003 7:02 pm    Post subject: Tim Allen Quotes Reply with quote

Hey everyone--I found these quotes by Tim on another site, thought I share them with you:

Women now have choices. They can be married, not married, have a job, not have a job, be married with children, unmarried with children. Men have the same choice we've always had: work or prison.

Men are liars. We'll lie about lying if we have to. I'm an algebra liar. I figure two good lies make a positive.

Electricity can be dangerous. My nephew tried to stick a penny into a plug. Whoever said a penny doesn't go far didn't see him shoot across that floor. I told him he was grounded.

My mom said the only reason men are alive is for lawn care and vehicle maintenance.

Playing golf is like going to a strip joint. After 18 holes you're tired and most of your balls are missing.

Women are like cars: we all want a Ferrari, sometimes want a pickup truck, and end up with a station wagon.

Never comment on a woman's rear end. Never use the words 'large' or 'size' with 'rear end.' Never. Avoid the area altogether. Trust me.
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